Greetings, admirers and minions. I am here bring joy into your lives, simply by being me. In return, please give me money so I can buy a bigger cage and tastier things to destroy. And also I need information on opening a bank account with no ID. Possibly in a bird-banking haven. Like the Canary Islands.
Dear Mr. Answer Bird:
I need advice. I'd like to know which is better to chew up - computer keyboards or TV remotes....I have to make a choice real soon.....
EAT YOUR BIRD TOY! EAT YOUR BIRD TOY! DO YOU LOVE ME? MORNING, BIRD!
I just have to say those things over and over. It's a parrot thing.
To answer your question, you have forced me to make a hard choice. Like pooping on top of the DVD player and getting immediate gratification--which I like--or pooping into it when the door opens and making the human buy a new one.
On the whole, I would have to say keyboards are better eating than remotes. The buttons in remote controls refuse to come out, and remotes are too heavy to carry while running from a human. However keyboard keys pop out very easily, and then they can be secreted in unknown remote locations. Like Dick Cheney.
After that, you get to sit on your perch enjoying a peanut while your human wanders around the room, looking behind things and saying wonderful new words for you to learn and repeat.
Now here is a video much better than the one the cockatoo put up. Because it features a real parrot and not a white thing that looks like an anorexic chicken.